Environmental Apocalypse Stock Photo Theater

Photo by Austin Distel on Unsplash

Coffee Mug Guy: “Data Dan. You say that the data shows that in the long run, the markets are likely to go through a large correction when people realize how bad the environmental damage to come is going to be from overshoot.”

Data Dan: “Correct. If demand outpaces regeneration for long enough, a system will collapse.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “So why don’t we just invest a bit of our profits in disinformation and media that tell people things aren’t that bad, or better yet - ignore the problem.”

Data Dan: “That’s already being done. It’s not working well anymore. You can’t fool all of the people all of the time.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “But if we told everyone how bad things are, they would want to change things quickly. That is disruptive and bad for profits. We can’t do that.”

Data Dan: “I think you’d be surprised. Most people realize things aren’t right and want to invest more in solutions. Most people would rather have a well-being-based economy, than one based on growth that only serves a small fraction of the population.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “There’s no money in that. There has to be another option.”

Data Dan: “You could build a time machine. It is theoretically possible. If successful you could go back in time and fix the overshoot crisis, but also make a killing in the market with your knowledge of the future.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “Ooh. I like that one. Let’s work the time machine angle.”

Data Dan: “You fired me last week, remember.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “That was before I knew that you could build a time machine.”

Data Dan: “I can’t. No one can.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “Wait, if you could build a time machine, wouldn’t I have already changed the future and be filthy rich right now.”

Data Dan: “You are already filthy rich. Time travel isn’t possible. I was messing with you. You have to live in this reality.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “Ooh. A bunker. I could build a doomsday bunker. I’d be fine.”

Data Dan: “Am I invited.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “No, you’re still fired.”

Data Dan: “Good.”

Coffee Mug Guy: “Kyle. Let’s get cracking on this time machine.”

Kyle: “Still playing Galaga over here.”